Loss and Change

My aunt Carol and I, 1987.
My aunt Carol and I, 1987.

For a couple of years now, I’ve used this blog to chronicle some of my adventures in web design and development. It started, honestly, as a way to respond to assignments in grad school, and it gradually became a way to chronicle my progress, and to contribute to the web community.

The last few months, though, have been something of a game-changer for me, and I feel compelled to change things up a bit with some content of a more personal nature.

In November, my aunt, Carol, was diagnosed with terminal double lung cancer. I finished school in December, and, in January, I started a gig as an adjunct instructor at the University of Florida. I also said goodbye to my grandmother-by-choice, Grandma Jeanette, who suffered a series of strokes and finally joined the love of her life in heaven. On February 3, Aunt Carol died, just a week after my sister and I said our goodbyes. A week ago, I said farewell to one of my aunts-by-choice as she moved to Texas in preparation for the birth of her grandbabies.

A lot’s changed. A lot’s changing, and I can’t help thinking about the future. Now that I’m done with school, I’m looking, once again, for full-time employment. There’s a strange sense of déjà vu here, in that I’ve already done this once, back when I graduated from college. At the time, I was under enormous pressure to find something quickly, and I took the scattered-seeds approach to job hunting. You know, where you send out a whole bunch of applications and pray that someone, anyone, replies?

This time, the pressure is off. Between teaching and working part-time at the church, some of the pressure is off. I can afford, at least for a little while, to focus my efforts on landing a job I want.

It’s an unbelievable privilege, one that many people never experience, and I’m grateful. Stay tuned for further developments, because, if the last few months are any indication, there’s no telling what life will look like tomorrow, much less six months or a year from now.

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